The first time I saw the stray was as I left home for work. He was curled up against the privet hedge, sleeping just inside my front garden. He looked up as the garden gate squeaked, but showed little interest in me. He passed from mildly interesting to completely forgotten in the time it took to reach my car.

The next time I saw the stray, he was laying full stretch in front of the fire in my living room. Jill had obviously met him and, Jill being Jill, had brought him in, probably fed him, mothered him and become his best friend, all in a day.

The dog looked up, mildly curious at who was entering the room, but returned his nose to his paws and contented sleep.

“I see you have met Fido.” Jill said as she closed the door behind her. “He’s a darling isn’t he?”

I leant forward and kissed her by way of hello.

“Fido?” I asked. “That the name you gave him, or is it on his collar?”

“Fido doesn’t have a collar. Fido doesn’t have any marks. The vet checked him over, he’s healthy and doesn’t have a chip or anything so, Fido is ours and he seems to like the name.”

“You’ve been to a vet already?” How long has he been ensconced I wondered.

“Yep, we went this morning, I found him outside looking all lost and bedraggled so we became friends.” It wasn’t the scene I remembered from this morning, he didn’t look too bedraggled or forlorn when I saw him.

“So, we are keeping him then I take it?”

“Oh yes please, he is such a darling and house trained already. He scratches at the back door when he needs to go out; isn’t that cute?” Jill looked with softening eyes at her new charge. “He likes mincemeat.”

“I’m sure he does. So, was that dinner in the dog then?” She laughed a giggle of delight, like a young girl who has won over her dad over a dispute.

Dinner will be in a little while, want a glass of wine?” Jill left Fido and me to get acquainted while she attended to pouring wine and checking on dinner.

I sat in my armchair and studied the dog. He had been aware of being the subject of conversation, but like a prisoner waiting for their sentence, had decided to keep a low profile, just using his eyes to follow the flow between us. He kept his head down, but silently regarded me with dark brown eyes, waiting for what ever happens next. He certainly filled the rug he was laying on. His whole body length sprawled with back legs sticking straight out backwards, something slightly unusual as a pose. His brindle coat shone, I guessed Jill had bathed him.

“So, you’re Fido then eh?” I asked the dog whose eyes followed, but no other movement as if he was afraid of antagonising me or appearing threatening. “I can see why Jill likes you, the strong silent type eh?”

His tail thumped on the floor once, by way of answer. His tan coloured eyebrows lifted in a comical expression. It was like the brows had been painted on his face. Everything else was a riot of mixed colours, except these eye brows, a bit like a Rottweiler has light coloured brows surrounded by black.

And so, Fido insinuated himself into the family, taking up the omission of children in our lives. We didn’t seem to be able to produce kids, but neither one of us really wanted to know badly enough, which of us was deficient. Besides, we were having too much fun.

Over the course of a week, Fido and I developed a quiet regard for each other. We would acknowledge each other, a pat on the head, a tail wag, but it was obvious from the start, he was devoted to Jill and followed her around the house as if connected by an invisible chord unless he was in his favourite position, in front of the fire, on the rug. When he was in this position, not very much would move him.

It was Friday night; we had a dinner date with friends of ours who wanted to show us their photos and video of their holiday in Viet Nam. Dave and Anne were always good hosts and dinner was usually spectacular.

Jill was supposed to be getting ready, but had been a long time, even for her and the time was marching on. I had to go and chivvy her along, otherwise we would be late. I’d been dressed for ages and becoming impatient.

Opening the bedroom door was something of a shock. Jill was flat on her back on the bed with Fido lapping dementedly at her hairless crotch. Her head was thrashing from side to side while a free fist was stuffed into her mouth, stifling her excited moans of pleasure. Her other hand was gripping the bed cover in a talon like claw, scrunching them up.

“Um, should I call Dave and cancel?” It was lame, but I really didn’t know what else to say. It isn’t like you would expect to see such a sight and kind of confuses the brain a little.

To her credit, Jill jumped up and pushed Fido away in one movement. She blushed instantly and began to stammer; something she reverts to when she is nervous, a hang over from her childhood.

“I don’t know what happened.” She managed to blurt out. “One minute I was sitting on the bed putting on my make up, then suddenly, Fido was giving me the most fantastic blow job and… well you saw. Christ on a stick Rob, that dog gives great head. It hasn’t happened before, up to now, Fido has been a perfect gentleman. I don’t know how it happened”

“Perhaps Fido should have been called dynamite.” I answered dryly.

“More like fucking Nitro.” Jill was getting under control, Nitro, nee Fido, had slunk out of the room and was nowhere to be seen.

“Nitro it is then. Now, are you going to get dressed? We should be able to make the sweet.”

It appeared that I was nonplussed by my wife cheating on me with a dog, but the feelings and emotions had to be thought through at a time when I was not quite so shocked. Of course I knew what the true meaning of a Lap dog was, but you really don’t expect it in your wife, the person you thought you knew so well, but really can surprise you, even shock you. With the twisted logic of a man, I kind of liked what I had seen too. It appealed to my sense of erotic and seeing Jill so turned on is always a pleasure.

We didn’t talk about it that evening, but the next morning was a different story. Both of us had had the time to think and brood on it. Breakfast coffee was a tense affair. Nitro had been let out and was running around the back yard, sniffing the hedges.

Jill was defensive at first, explaining that she had come out of the shower, sat naked on the bed while she applied her make up and then, before she knew it, Nitro had shoved his nose between her legs and begun to give her the best licking of her life.

“Honest to goodness, he hit my clit straight off and you know how that turns me on.”

“But a dog Jill? I mean, come on, it ain’t natural.”

“Well I didn’t ask him to do it. He just started and I lost control. Fucking hell Rob, it isn’t like I’m fucking some bloke.” Her defensiveness belied the credence of her answers.

“And it hasn’t happened before?” I asked and took a sip of coffee while I looked at her over the rim of the cup.

“Well no…not really.”

“What does not really mean?”

“Well he has shoved his nose into my fanny before once or twice, but I thought he was just being friendly and pushed him away. Last night was the first time I have been naked in front of him.” She too sipped her coffee and stared back at me, her eyes steady adding truth to her statement. “Oh, he likes my panties as well. Keeps chewing them to bits, I’ve got to buy some more.”

“So what we going to do about this Jill? Being cuckolded by the family pet is a little disconcerting to say the least.”

“I will have to stop him doing it. Perhaps if I smack his nose, he will understand that it isn’t allowed.”

“I might want to see that again. It was fantastic seeing you in such a state. Nitro seems to know his way around”. I had been thinking during the night and the memory of Jill with her fist in her mouth gave me the hardest woody even.

“It wasn’t planned Rob, he just snuck up on me, but you’re right, he does seem to know what buttons to lick. His tongue is incredible and had me coming quicker than anything.” She began to blush again, always a pretty sight and, judging by the hardened nubs of her nipples pushing against the terry cloth of her dressing gown, the memory was not unpleasant at all.

“Better than mine?” The question slipped out unbidden and I regretted it immediately.

“Different, Rob. Just fucking different, okay?” I knew I had crossed a boundary and shown a jealousy never before realised.

Suitably mollified, but blundering blithely on with all the sensitivity of a house brick I asked.

“So will you get it on with Nitro do you think?” Why didn’t I just light a short fuse and see where it led?

“Well that really depends on Nitro doesn’t it? But, if you carry on acting like an asshole, you won’t know will you?” She was pissed at me for being so pushy and jealous.

It took a day or so before she settled down enough to broach the subject again.