User mysisterissxy | Commented

zorro7191 5101 days ago

mysisterissxy 5573 days ago

- 4 + it's alot better than some of the stuff that I have read on ssp lately. For now I would say work on your imagination, build up to the sex and the use of proper or close to proper english, it just sounded a little too much like you are still in junior high

Spring Break by

ThePantyNinja 5101 days ago

mysisterissxy 5573 days ago

- 8 + may I recomend that you work the description of what the people look like into the story instead of using the "let me tell you about" routine. and on another note once you have mentioned something you don't really need to repeat it, especially in a short

The Seduction Of Jacquee by

Jonathan Wayne 5101 days ago

mysisterissxy 5573 days ago

- 6 + This story had so much potential and turned out to be ok when it could have been great. Here are my suggestions.

First thing is first, if something happened fifteen years ago write the rest of it within just a few years. One, Two or maybe even three ye

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