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kylee_is_hot Member Since October 19, 2009
my come true fantasy with my aunt by gus08 5326 days ago
kylee_is_hot 5458 days ago
- 5 + Not a bad storyline. Thought it lacked detail. Punctuation - Speech marks, would make it much easier to read.

Try and write in the same tense, you are continually switching tenses and it is quite annoying.