Llhorn15
Member Since October 19, 2009
lil boy fun
by
smilesnd
5071 days ago
Llhorn15
5543 days ago
smilesnd
5071 days ago
Llhorn15
5543 days ago
-
2
+
You write like a hillbilly talks.
My Sis Obsession
by
liam1090
liam1090
* is as low as I can go. A -***would be better
Go back to school and learn how to spell and write
Go back to school and learn how to spell and write
Alone for the weekend
by
naughty_girl2
naughty_girl2
One big paragraph.
Learn how to write before you submit any more stories.
Learn how to write before you submit any more stories.
Dad and his frinds raped me
by
Sun Chips
Sun Chips
What language is this written in?
Get someone who is intelligent to read your stories before you post them.
The spelling is terrible.
Get someone who is intelligent to read your stories before you post them.
The spelling is terrible.
A nice collage story
by
Stinz12
Stinz12
Use dictonary.
A collage is a group photos in a frame.
How did your story ever get posted as a sex story?
A collage is a group photos in a frame.
How did your story ever get posted as a sex story?
Me and my best friend
by
dudewhere
dudewhere
Some punctuation would help along with some paragraphs.
5 1/2 inches around. Give me a break.
5 1/2 inches around. Give me a break.
Kelly's sexy schoolgirl panties - chapter 1
by
emily
emily
Try using a writing tool called a paragraph before you write any more.
I stopped reading after the first few lines because it rambled on and on.
I stopped reading after the first few lines because it rambled on and on.
The Wedding Night I Won't Ever Forget
by
BONDAGE
BONDAGE
What school did you go to?
What language is it written in
What language is it written in
Passed Out Drunk
by
CalicoJack
CalicoJack
Make up your mind. On one line you say she doesn't have tits and then you say he's cupping her tits.
My little sis(part one)
by
lovenator.kevin
lovenator.kevin
don't bother writing any more until you take some writing,grammer,and spelling lessons
Teacher teach so meany things!
by
hott_surfer109
hott_surfer109
Gimme a break. 8 inches around. That's as big as a soup can. Even John Holmes wasn't that big.
2 Girls from school and her dad?
by
sugarhighwoo
sugarhighwoo
try using periods so everything doesn't run together