billyleeblack
Member Since October 19, 2009
Love My Sister
by
Jim Moore
5071 days ago
billyleeblack
5542 days ago
Jim Moore
5071 days ago
billyleeblack
5542 days ago
-
2
+
Safe is the best word I have. Your writing isn't fun, isn't exciting, and isn't even original. It's the same boring thing they've given us a thousand times before. You can't just write about the events anymore. Make your readers mouths water, and not
Making Daddy Feel Good
by
phil05
phil05
Do people even read these stories or just post a review based on the topic. Although my favorite base are father/daughter from the daughters point of view, that doesn't make them all absolutely great. This story was far too short, direct, and lacking of
Dana and Nick's special sex
by
misstrouble
misstrouble
See that 1 there? You don't deserve it. There was no story, no sex, and no thought. However, at least you spelled everything right, which is better than most people do.
THE DAY I Dide it
by
hotdog49
hotdog49
There are so many things wrong with this story that it's hard to list. Just dont write anymore. You're spelling is horrible, your grammar leaves MUCH to be desired... oh, and where was the incest? Just because he's "Brother Robert" doesnt' make him HER
Fun on the Weekend
by
wickdjester
wickdjester
I will not justify this with a response. I'll give you 1 point for spelling everything right.
Sisterly love
by
roger28752000
roger28752000
This doesn't even count as erotica tofu. at least tofu has the bare essentials. This is not a story about what happened... it's a comment that it did happen. Lets try applying this to some classic literature........ Captain Ahab killed a whale.......
DOING THE DOBERMANS
by
TINY WALDO
TINY WALDO
I found how to give a 0.
Wht the heck was this? Were you on a quest to see how many times you could accurately use the word bitch in one story? I'm sorry, but in all my year on this site, I have never read a story worse than this one. I ACTUALLY dow
Wht the heck was this? Were you on a quest to see how many times you could accurately use the word bitch in one story? I'm sorry, but in all my year on this site, I have never read a story worse than this one. I ACTUALLY dow
The Best Decision of My Life - Loving Cousins
by
JohnnyJunior67
JohnnyJunior67
This would have been a 5, except for the mood killer about the condom. Had you mentioned it going on earlier, no problem. Had you not made it into a joke, no problem. But specifically mentioning that you hadn't mentioned it kind of came off jokey... no
Night at the Campground
by
bmd_06
bmd_06
Was this a story? I know it's a first try, but seriously you could have done better. Not even amateur work here. Take what you have and consider it to be thought 3. Now, write thoughts 1 and 2 leading up to thought 3. Then, rewrite thought 3 to make
One Special Night
by
bob7525
bob7525
Well fomed, Good concept, but it came off like a horse race to me. Started good, strong but subtle. Picked up the pace around the middle. And then it was just a mad dash ending.
A little advice for the future.... Write the story, then back up and 'r
A little advice for the future.... Write the story, then back up and 'r
Breeding slave part -2
by
Masters_lilcocksucker
Masters_lilcocksucker
Masters... I think I see where you're going with this, and you need to stop. Don't stop writing, because your writing style is original and decent, but you need to stop breaking it up 1 paragraph per story. Try again, only this time, make the entire "pr
Me and Caitlin
by
jackhard
jackhard
So many reasons why this story should never have been writen. For one, it could have fit on an index card, and not one of those awesome 5x8 cards that lawyers use... the 3x5 cards that elementary school students use. Next, there was no story. It was 2
My daughter ...A tale of a true slut
by
HungStud
HungStud
In case you dont understand what "Erotica Tofu" means, here's a clear breakdown. It's all the bare essentials to survive, but with no real substance. It was a well writen story, and I can tell that you'll do well if you keep writing, but you didnt go in
Me And My Sister Sneek In
by
tommy_666
tommy_666
Inside the Cynic, what you've just written is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in your rambling, incoherent story were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone on this site is no
sleeping with my mum
by
inthefamily
inthefamily
This could have been a great story. Please heed my direction. Expand on what you have writen. Detail, smells, feelings, all of it matters. Also, the lack of paragraphs made this very difficult to read and follow. Lastly, watch your capitalization. H
Horny Sister
by
Mindmaster
Mindmaster
Defninantly one of the best incest stories I've seen on here in a while. Not really maximizing the depth of the characters, though.
It seemed to me like you were trying to abbreviate everything without looking like you were abbreviating everything. E
It seemed to me like you were trying to abbreviate everything without looking like you were abbreviating everything. E
my sisters sleepover
by
lastcallg
lastcallg
What the hell was that? I've seen longer stories written on an index card. How did the girls know to tie him up? How many girls was it? How were the girls built? I've seen 16 year old guys who could stand up and walk with 8 13 year old girls trying t
The Sitter
by
flip
flip
I agree with travis 200% on this one. Learn what your writing, and think about what it means. This story would have been better as a gay story than a teen story, and it still wouldn't have been very good.
Mitchs Adventures in Incest (LONG!)
by
wickedtea
wickedtea
This was a great story, I loved every bit of it. The only thing keeping this from being 5 star is that it was, in my opinion, mislabeled. Although yes, there was some incest involving the central character, it wasn't the main focus, from what I could te
Mom and I .
by
brentoes
brentoes
It wasn't bad, but wasn't great. Really, nothing phenominal or orignal about it. It felt like it was drafted from a template (now isn't that a scary thought?). Good use of description and a decent attempt at a back-story, but for the most part, the sto
Knocking Up Sis 2
by
thedogofpower
thedogofpower
I loved the first story. I could understand the coniving, the deception, and the ultimate plan. I watched as it was unfolded. This story was supposed to be about the same kind of revenge, but it just wasn't there. The sex was passe as best, and the di
My Daughter and ME
by
necodemas
necodemas
Structured badly, and weak premise. I really didnt catch the girl wanting to have sex with her father so much as wanting to be pregnant with their child and sex just happened to be the most convienant way. I'll give ya 2 for originality, but you really
Making Out With Mom
by
Chunks
Chunks
I guess this is a love-hate-story. People who really like good erotica will love this story. People who want to read about moms and sons having sex will hate this story. I'm of the previous from those two. Great story. Keep up the good work, but not
Heather
by
Babewatcher
Babewatcher
One of the better stories on the site, definantly. It took a long time to get to the action, but it was right in this instance. The only thing keeping this as a 4, instead of the 5 it really deserves was the last line. PLEASE, and I know I'll be flame
Just 1 Crazy night ill remember
by
jayloves69a
jayloves69a
ya know, it's bad enough when a really bad story cuts off short, which in a really bad story is usually about 2 paragraphs. But this, you should be ashamed of yourself. This was actually getting off on the right foot. It stood a great chance to be a gr
Daddy and I
by
Jolly1
Jolly1
If it's possible I'd like to see your template. In all actuality, this story, while fun to read, wasn't exactly a turn on. Certain points that needed more explaination while others you expand way too deeply. My best advice... write the story, and then