User Minion | Commented | Sex Stories Post

moms pussy. by

sglide99 4487 days ago

Minion 4487 days ago

- 1 + This was not a bad concept but it was far too short and too rushed. Take your time and stretch it out a bit, give more details or at least more than one scene.

My Boner turns me Invisible - Part 2 by

JeffreyFreemont 4722 days ago

Minion 4717 days ago

- 0 + You have a really good concept for a story, but your dialogue needs A LOT of work. Your main character sounds like he has about 4 brain cells when he's talking - who walks up to a girl and just says I WANT YOU?. You also need to decide if he is wearing his clothes or not while invisible, you keep saying that his clothes don't become invisible so he strips but then he "feels his cock pressing against his jeans" and has to "take out his cock." If he's naked, what is he taking it out of?

Jen big black bang by

Kaos 5025 days ago

Minion 5023 days ago

- 0 + This was a really great concept and could have been a lot better if you had edited for spelling and been a bit more descriptive. Use a good spell checker or ask someone to edit for you and you could have a 10/10 story here.

Big Breasted Redhead + Me + Sex Infront Of Fellow Students In Computer Room = Epic Win by

IputTheANALinCorpseAnalysis 5149 days ago

Minion 5149 days ago

- 0 + Very poorly written, full of numerous grammatical errors and unless I read it wrong something that completely defied physics. Get a friend or volunteer to edit for you in the future, you have some real potential it just needs to be polished.

Fucked by a Wolf Pack by

rareisme 5287 days ago

Minion 5286 days ago

- 0 + Some more detail and a little more build up would have turned a good idea into an amazing story.

There Can Be Only One Ch 33 by

Nastyman 5308 days ago

Minion 5104 days ago

- 1 + When do we get more? You might have a lynch mob on your hands soon man.

Fell in love with rex. by

LOIS 5312 days ago

Minion 5311 days ago

- 0 + You had a really good idea for a story, but please next time run a spell checker, and ask a friend to edit for grammar.