Sex Starved Wives

[bren122]

FRom the NineMSN news service; made me laugh. i just love the way everybody in the article assumes it's the man's fault!


Hot on the heels of the cougar, sex therapists say a new brand of liberated women has emerged — sex-starved wives who are standing up for their needs in the bedroom.

Women with a higher sex drive than their husbands were becoming increasingly vocal about their suffering, sex therapist Bettina Arndt told ninemsn.

"There has been as steady trickle of women coming to me complaining that they are not getting enough sex," she said.

"There are women out there who want a lot of sex and whose husbands simply can't keep up."

Arndt, who is the author of The Sex Diaries, said four out of 10 sexually frustrated women she had recently been corresponding with had ended their relationships because of the problem.

Sydney psychologist and sex therapist Serena Cauchi said she had also noticed the trend.

"It is not as uncommon as you would think," she told ninemsn.

“There are women who have come to me who have a higher sex drive than their husbands.

"Women may react just as men may do in this situation; some have affairs and some choose to end the relationship."

One Melbourne woman, who did not wish to be named, told ninemsn she had been sexually frustrated for at least half of her 14-year marriage.

"When we first got together, there was never an issue with my husband’s sex drive, we would have sex at least five times a week," she said.

"But in the last seven years he has become less and less interested — now we would probably only have sex once a week."

The 42-year-old woman said her self esteem had "taken a battering" because of the constant rejection from her husband.

"Having a husband who is hardly interested in having sex with me anymore has made me feel like it's my fault."

"I feel like a failure as a wife and as a woman."

Arndt said one of her subjects, "Barb", had only had sex twice in the last 17 years.

Women who found themselves in a similar situation often felt hurt and wounded, she said.

"It is an intolerable thing for them because they think they are not desirable — it eats away at them not being wanted."

"They are often perplexed because they talk to their friends who are all complaining about having to beat their husbands off with a stick."

Arndt said more research needed to be done to find out why some men were troubled by a low sex drive, a task made more difficult because men were often unwilling to talk about it.

"We need to find out more about what is happening to the men and why."

[blackcat969]

stuff like this really gets my goat, ie: the way the article makes it seem as if it is the man's fault. I mean if a woman cheats or wants out of marriage because of the "man's low sex drive" then she is to be pitied. If a man does that then the woman is pitied because the man is a cad. the old damned if you do damned if you don't. and why is this? because the man is a man and not a woman? Sorry but if a woman can't put up with her husband's lack of sex drive and is considered a "victim" then why should men put up with a wife who refuses him?

[Harry Chimp]

I cannot help feeling, all this is a lot of hogwash, I know enough women, who would not fuck for love or money.
I myself am going into year 7 without sex from my wife. She doesn't any longer feel like it,
as for my feelings, men aren't supposed to have any.
I am 73 going on 74, ten years younger I would just walk.
Losing everything at my age, is something I cannot afford.
Worked too bloody hard for everything too.
Sadly women are good housekeepers, they always get to keep the house.
Us men are just suckers, betrayed by our balls.

[Luckymann]

Right on Harry. Of course, in my younger days, I was one of those whom the horny ladies turned to for comfort. If there's a moral here, it's this: Whether you're male or female, take care of your mate at home. There is always someone out there that will fill in for you if you don't.

[testicle3455]

Women love sex like the next man.

[Brigit Astar]

The key to this whole thing is Arndt's statement that "more research is needed to be done." This is always a giveaway that she has been receiving money from a government grant, and wants more.

[desi4]

they defiantly need someone

[megan]

I seem to agree with some of the comments basically because I am finding I am finding a few more women are seeking women for their sexual satisfaction. Its not all older women either. Most of the comments from the few I have had conversations/experiences with seem to say their husbands/partners are not as interested or cannot perform other than short time or want oral sex rather than penetrative sex. Women enjoying other women - if their man is not doing his bit - its not a lot but it is increasing and it is evident from what I am seeing in the hospitallity industry and in women in their 20/30s.
Then again women have become a little more forthcoming and where they did it to keep HIM happy before - they are doing to fulfil THEIR needs more and are not as reluctant/shy as it seems they have been in the past.
Possibly more women are becoming more demanding of their sex partners and less inhibited. It has also been said women now seek orgasm from sex, and are not frightened to be more demonstative when they do, than they did it the past and they guys just cant keep it going long enough. I have always insisted on being 50% of the union and not just be available for him when he wants it.

[espana]

During the holiday period the towns and beach resorts are full of so called frustrated women I have given up the number of times I have heard the female version of {my wife doesent understand me } to justify a holiday fling. Yes I have seen men with absolutley stunning partners totaly ignore them there love for the bottle or golf greater than there desire for there women.

I love these guys as they enrich my sex life giving me a very rich and diverse number of women to both enjoy and give enjoyment to there is though a small percentage of ladys of all age groups whos attitude and ridgidity even in a holiday one nighter that leads me to belive that nothing and nobody will ever make them enjoy sex

[testicle3455]

There are widows in their 40s who want to be fucked by studs in their 20s. The widows know what they want and have it, they do not care who else those men fuck.

[smoothshy]

I feel for anyone not getting their needs met in the bedroom. How frusturating! Of course, as a good-looking woman, I can only imagine *smug*

[drlauren]

I would say suburban housewives are also the fastest growing segment who watches porn and most likely to go into the sex biz after college girls. In all the sex clubs I went to, Cougars were among the top single women that joined. Young like me (even when 18) was a minority. They were bored with husbands so came to sex clubs to fuck. True.

[drlauren]

Megan,

The lesbian bars I go to that are meat markets are half cougars, and 75% of those are married, just looking for NSA. I didn't mess with married men (or single) except at sex clubs at all. Married women, sure. I'd say lesbians and gay men are far more sexual than straight people overall. 90% of the women at sex clubs are bi there.

[Marlene38EE]

I would say suburban housewives are also the fastest growing segment who watches porn and most likely to go into the sex biz after college girls. In all the sex clubs I went to, Cougars were among the top single women that joined. Young like me (even when 18) was a minority. They were bored with husbands so came to sex clubs to fuck. True.

The 'trick' hubby uss to keep up with me is simple; Pacing. It's a nice middlezone between my near-nymphomaniacal sex-drive and the simple physical limitations of male physiology.
Also, he's taken the time to study and learn what really turns the trick for me regarding pleasure.
He's one of those guys who like seeing a woman 'O' a few times before having their fun, and triggering her off to something really wet and explosive when he's cumming.
Like in sports, a proper 'warm-up' does wonders. :thumb:

[Brigit Astar]

You're spot on with word "pacing." Too many men don't realize that if they'd just slow down, the pleasure grows and becomes more intense the more you pace and space it out.

[Marlene38EE]

You're spot on with word "pacing." Too many men don't realize that if they'd just slow down, the pleasure grows and becomes more intense the more you pace and space it out.

Exactly!!
Sex is GREAT!! Why 'rush' through it??
...unless it's a 'quickie' where rushing things is just part of the fun. :Grin_anim:

[lookinforward]

I can believe this report. Women have sexually liberated themselves and their attitudes toward self pleasure are becoming very equal to that of men. I guess like men, if these ladies personal relationships with their husbands/significant others can stand the strain of their looking outside the box for sexual satisfaction.. why not.

[Pale Rider]

The happy and satisfied route is much fun, however sometimes we just need something different, or at least we think we do.

[Pale Rider]

It's the only explaination I can come up with to justify this forums heavy usage along with everything else on the "WWW"

[Ariessouls]

yep again its the mans fault...................LOL

[PaPa_Wolf]

To me there is a large difference between developing a relationship where each can express to the other the needs they have and how best to satisfy those needs versus one where one person places demands on the other to "Please me." A sexual relationship is never just about sex, not if it is to really be satisfying to both parties. It also involves understanding what it takes for both to be satisfied. A relationship where it is "gimmee gimmee gimmee" is never going to go the distance.

[FrankNbeans]

I think I need to do some personal investigation into these cougars for myself! I would be happy to help fulfill their needs.

[dragonsclaw]

Hi, I am a male living in the suffolk countryside. From my experience all ages of married women in my local area want more sex and are not afraid to look outside the marital bed for it either. I currently have three married ladies and one single lady as regular weekly lovers. Between them and their various kinks they just about keep up with my sexual needs. They get the sex that they want and so do I. It's a great arrangement for all of us.